


A few words too many

by CirilEowyn



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime), Sailor Moon - All Media Types
Genre: Break Up, F/M, Fate, Heartbreak, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-18
Updated: 2012-05-18
Packaged: 2017-11-05 14:22:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/407427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CirilEowyn/pseuds/CirilEowyn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not their time, yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A few words too many

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfiction takes place some years after the last season of Sailor Moon. It's based on the anime and not the manga as the character portrayals differ quite a bit in both.

It had been only ten minutes since he left, but to her it seemed like an eternity. Maybe she had been alone a long time before without knowing it. It was hard to realize that the dream she had built her live on was broken, more than this, gone.

She did not know whose fault it had been, maybe it was nobodys fault, it did not matter anymore, he was gone and she was alone. After all these years together she had never noticed his evasive look or the glitter of relief in his eyes when they had found out that she could not get children.

He had never really been happy with her. Oh, he had loved her, but how? Like his untouchable princess from another life or like his litte sister? She did not know any longer. Both made no difference anymore. She still felt the warm touch of his hand on her arm...

She had been asleep already but awoke from the footsteps in the li ving room. He had been awake all night wandering around their apartement. Softly she called him, but he did not notice. Slowly she dressed in her morning gown, feeling the change in the air. He was not suprised to see her standing in the door. His eyes were wet from tears, his voice broken when he said "Usako, I'm sorry!" She took him in her arms and he cried on her shoulder for a long time until the tears ran dry. She was not sure what this was all about, when he took her arm and placed her on the couch. "We have to talk!" he said.

She had suspected the worst, that he spent the night with another woman, but not this. Not one second had she thought that this could happen.

"I don't love you anymore, I don't know if I ever loved you, but I know that Endymion did," he said with a broken voice, afraid to look at her, afraid of the hurt in her eyes and that he would take back what he just said although it was the truth. It had always been true. She did not say anything, so he continued, his black hair hiding his now empty blue eyes. "I should have told you earlier, I should have known it. We never really had something in common between us, nothing except our past, a past long forgotten for everyone else except us. When I knew that you could not get children, when I knew that we would be reborn again as true lovers in Crystal Tokyo, I was so relieved that it would not be upon us to do this. Do you understand me!?" he cried shaking her shoulders. "Do you understand?" he whispered.

Of course she did not. How could she? Everything she ever wanted, everything that meant something in her live, was her Mamo-chan. He had been her dream, her happiness. And now he told her, that he did not love her, that he had felt oblieged to stay with her, to try to love her. It had been a farce all the time. Of course she too had realized that it would not be in her hands to build Crystal Tokio, raise Chibi-Usa and fight against the Dark Moon another time. But did this mean that there was no future with Mamoru for her in this live? For Mamoru it obviously did.

"B...but don't you love me?" she whispered raising her eyes to his. Those big blue eyes, shimmering with tears seemed like the endless ocean to him. Those beautiful, beautiful eyes, that expressed nothing else but hurt and hope now. Those eyes that had always made him smile. He searched his soul, remembering all those small things that he had loved about her, once upon a time. But now it was different, the memories had faded, Endymion had faded from him. There was only Mamoru left now.

"I ...don't.", he said, breaking away from her steady gaze. He did not know what he should say; he talked a long time though, telling her about his feelings, his confusion and his decision. She did not listen any longer. The only thing in her mind was a song she had recently heard on the radio. Always the same few words, round and round in her head.

_Wait a minute_

_What did you say_

_Did I hear you say_

_There's no real reason left for you to stay?_

_Under your breath I hear your soft voice break_

_Can we still be friends_

_I hear you talking but you're just not making sense_

_I've been hoping for a happy ending_

_Now I know that there won't be any_

_Just a few words too many_

_In my head_

_A few words too many_

_In this bed_

_A few words too many_

_Left unsaid_

_Oh I wish that we were strangers_

_We could start again_

_Start again_

_All over_

_A broken shadow falls across your face_

_As you hesitate_

_Trying to think of all the things you need to say_

_Bare face the truth lies at my feet_

_As you turn away_

_Sometimes silence has a way of making peace_

_I've been hoping for a happy ending_

_Now I knew that there won't be any_

_Staring at the ceiling_

_Wondering just what you're feeling_

_Was it me_

_Or was it you_

_What's the difference If I knew_

_Maybe I wouldn't feel so empty_

_If I had heard a few words too many_

_In my head_

_A few words too many_

_In this bed_

_A few words too many_

_Left unsaid_

_Oh I wish that we were strangers_

_We could start again_

_Start again_

_Start all over again_

_We could start again_

_We could start again_

_Round and round and round and round_

_In my head Yeah Wait a minute_

_What did you say_

_Did I hear you say_

She awoke from her stasis when he stood up. "Do you understand?" he asked again. As if it would matter. He had made his choice for both of them. There was no _them_ any longer. Now she understood. There had never been a _them_ after the final battle with Galaxia and definitely not after that visit to the doctor. Perhaps she had felt it too. The feeling that it was too early, too soon for both of them, too soon for a happy ending. Perhaps. Slowly she nodded. "Yes, I understand," she whispered with a broken voice.

"Can we be friends", he asked timidly. "Like in the song," she thought, "just like in the song."

"Mamoru," he winced at this, she had always called him Mamo-chan, as long as he could remember. "Please leave me alone now," she said. She could not believe it herself. It was gone, the feeling was gone, all there was left was a space filled with emptiness. He made a last attempt, a last try to get her absolution, but she did not listen any longer. She was gone, lost in her thoughts of loneliness and pain. After a last long look he had left.

She heard the door close with a pang. She felt like a bullet had hit her heart, like it had burst from within, by something well kept and well warmed there. Yes, now he was gone, and he had been gone long before this moment. There was no way she could lie to herself any longer. She had known it all along. It was so hard to look at the truth, to think about all the times he had looked at her with those beautiful blue eyes, and nothing in them. The change had started soon after their last battle, soon after the Sailor Senshi had disappeared from the front pages of the newspapers. She had loved him anyway, beyond the love of the fading moon princess within her.

There was nothing to be done now. Slowly the pain eased. When the sun rose over the horizon she was already asleep. Deep within her, the silver millennium crystal that was also her star seed, worked. It cleaned away the hurt, the pain, the loneliness and left only hope. Another star seed far away awoke its owner. It was time now. Time for the unthinkable, time for the connection of two star seeds that should never have met. Time for a new life, at least in this one they both should have a chance at their own little piece of happiness.

Usagi awoke when the sun touched her face. Slowly she stretched yawning and relaxed. Then she remembered it, all of it. To her surprise it did not hurt. It did not matter anymore. She could feel his presence, the speeding up of her heartbeat. He was near. She undressed and slipped under the shower. Then she chose the lightest and happiest of her summer dresses. She was ready when he knocked at her door. Excited and a little bit anxious she went to open it. She paused a second, enveloped in the feeling of things to come.

She pushed the door-handle and there he was. Long, dark hair surrounded his expressive face. Dark blue eyes were looking at her. "I'm here," he said. She smiled at him with this beautiful smile of hers and took him by his hand. "I want to go to the park," she said, giggling softly at the look on his face when she drew him after her. Finally he was back. Finally he was here. The love of her live, the love of THIS live.

Seiya Kou.

**Author's Note:**

> Heavily inspired by the song "A few words too many" by Billie Myers. Do look it up, it's fabulous.


End file.
